It sounded like a tragic accident, and I felt a bit protective--a year earlier I had been working in New York (interning at a video production company), and was still hoping to relocate to the Big Apple. I remember a clear, blue sky that morning, and I recall the radio being turned on for more details... then we learned that a second plane struck the World Trade Center.
I don't remember the weather from that point on... just a feeling of the day growing darker and darker. Confusion and some concern over whether there would be more attacks (there were... the Pentagon and Pennsyvania). Being a video production guy, it was ironic that I didn't have television at that time (still setting up my apartment, and reception in the Berkshires was lousy without cable--a time when I shouldn't have needed a digital converter). I listened to the radio non-stop... heard stories from friends and co-workers... talked to the girl I was dating at the time, and finally went over to her family's house to see pictures of the towers burning and filling the sky with chaos. The visual that really got to me was on the front page of the paper the next day or so... a photo of people choosing to jump out of the struck buildings instead of being engulfed by flames. Man, that affected me...
It was a really strange time. Maybe it was better that I wasn't in New York, but I really wanted to be--more than ever. I ended up donating blood and doing some other volunteer work. It was the only time I seriously thought about enlisting.
I remember this TV special... a sort of memorial concert, and U2 playing. Somber. black and white. Felt unlike any concert I had seen in the U.S. It was quite moving:
There were flags flying everywhere... after a few years, it felt like a bit too much, but in this current time of partisan politics, it's somewhat hard to remember how "united" the country felt right after the terrorist attacks...
I waited to visit Ground Zero. When we opened the Rockwell show at the Guggenheim months after the attacks, a couple of my colleagues caught a train down to see the area... I wasn't ready to experience that... or rather, I didn't want to treat it like some sort of sight-seeing spot.
It was four years later when I finally traveled to Ground Zero. I had been in New York to attend a concert and conduct an interview with my favorite band, A-ha (on September 11, 2005, actually), and the day after felt like the right time to finally see the site. I was shooting b-roll footage of the city at that time, but I don't remember filming there. I looked around at the tributes... marveled at the gaping hole where the buildings once stood.
Two years ago I went back to the site, and this time filmed the area rather extensively for some visuals I was creating for the Spoken Word Almanac Project. The process of rebuilding seemed slow... there was some controversy about a mosque being built near the area... New York still seemed hard, but a little more sympathetic... or maybe I had just gotten more used to the city, having rented an apartment there for several months.
Last year, on the tenth anniversary, I attended a beautiful interfaith ceremony with Sarah and her family in Albany. It was touching... a time to reflect on this national tragedy that still stings... still seems so inconceivable... and honor the fallen--paying respects as we do every year. They may have hurt us, but at the same time, I recognized the progress... the resolve to keep moving.
I also remember thinking in my head about my exciting plans to propose to Sarah in just days... positive... sweet vibes... another affirmation that life was just going to go on...
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